Keep it chill

For this past week, I realize that I can be a real biatch when it comes to work. Ah well, I admit it, I do make mistakes at times, most of the times to be frank. But I will get real pissed when others screw up my station.

I assumed that people with years of experience are fast in picking up the pace. I assumed that they know what should be done. I assumed a lot of things. Because of all these assumptions, I get irritated when it did not turn out to be what I expected it to be.

I was taught by my manager to not trust anyone else but myself, and do not make assumptions. Do not make assumptions that some things are not needed, hence no need to be checked before throwing it into the dumpter. So, yes, do not F up my station, if not don't blame me if I am being rude.

Do not mess with girls who are working in FnB. We get irritated fast when things doesn't go in our way, and yes, we do have mood swing like any other girls, perhaps worst during PMS. So yes, we will try and be understanding, hence, have some patience at the same time. A lot of patience to be frank.

Anyways, I will try to keep my cool because its only one week time. Breathe in and out and hope I will not burst out anytime soon. haha. And oh! Please do not step on my tail! If not, you shall be black listed.

Maturity gap

Do you agree that girls always mature faster than guys?

Somehow, I always feels that girl's brain work better in primary and secondary school. Not to say I became dumb in University, just that I realize most guys do much better in University compared to high school days. Not trying to be sexist of what, this is just my humble opinion. Seems like brain is developed in a different pace for both sex.

Girls tend to think more maturely compared to guys of their own age. We tend to think a lot deeper and further.

For myself, I always think ahead, like very ahead. When I was in high school, I hid myself in my room, and starting to calculate how much I need to save every year so I could get a house in ten years time. Well, I DID that for real. But of course whatever conclusion I came about at that time, I could not remember any bit of it. That is for me.

Guys tend to Not think so much ahead. For them, well most of the guys that I know, they just will think later. Tomorrow seems to be so far away, so they will think about it later and not now. haha. Just an example. But not all guys are like that of course. There will be a stage whereby girls are thinking about the future and guys are still thinking about what to do later.

Gap.

Because of this gap, guys may think that girls over think about everything. But as you grow up, you will realize that hey, what she said at that time was right. Sometimes, not all the time. Depends on each individual I guess?

I don't know how people thought of me in the past, but I knew I have done my best. I had tried my best to minimize the damage and I had give it all.Well, or so I thought. Everyone thinks differently you see. I don't know how much they had changed, but I certainly hope it is for the best. I hope...

What's the point of writing this post? Well, I guess i just feel like writing it out without any focus point. Some people may get it, and some may not. Practice makes perfect I suppose?

Anyways, have a great week ahead!

I wish for.....

Wishes

Through the years, I have always been a very realistic person when it comes to Birthday Wishes. Also because my birthday always fall after major exams and slightly before the release of exam results, hence my first wish is always getting full Ace in my exams, whether UPSR, PMR, SPM, Diploma finals, Higher Dip finals and finally degree finals. Call me boring, but hey, all my wishes came true no?

Nonetheless, this year I did not wish for me getting ace in exam, like DUHHHHH. I wish for my career path to be smooth and if everything goes well, climb up up and away ~~ Of course, this can not be achieve without a lot of hard work and endurance. So, please be good to me 2013! I would love to have a fuller pocket. ^^

Then, I wish for my Korea trip to be the trip of year other than my previous France trip which was awesome! Well, after all it is my first trip that is fully sponsored by my hard earn bonus last year, therefore it must be AWESOME! Much planning must be done after the CNY holidays. Fighting!

And thirdly, the supposingly mysterious wish shall remain untold. 

Well there you go, wishes for this year. Boring I know, but hey! As long as it is feasible and economical, it is still a good wish alright? haha. Anyways, gotta get back to work now! Break time over.

2013

2013

24

Can you believe it I am already 24 years old this year? I am in another awkward stage whereby I have to knock myself in my head when I am tempted to buy super girly things because it doesn't suits me anymore. I am no longer a teenager with raging hormones, but a young adult with responsibilities.

In this new year, I have to learn that money is not everything. I have to learn how to treat myself better by not being so stingy, or thriftily ( Another word I learn from Miss CKW ). . Travel while I am young ( Or when SGD is strong..haha ) and enjoy good food. What my friend said is true, what other things are more enjoyable than travelling and having great food? Hence korea trip in April and perhaps another one coming up end of this year. AWESOME!

Saving money is essential, but sometimes sharing is caring. Learn how to treat my brothers and parents better and not feel bad for burning a hole in my pocket for them. Sometimes I am so strict with myself when it comes to money that I feel so bad for not reaching my savings target every month. I check my bank account balance as frequent as how many times I check my weight in a day which is bad. I need to loosen up a bit and learn how to balance it up.

I need to find my motivation to study this year. I have a year to prepare for a competition and I have to swallow a hell load of knowledge during this period. I need to smack myself, and beaten myself up so I could be more discipline and have a more structure study module for myself. I can do this! If I want to do this, it has to be the best! GAMBATE!!!!

Learn more, absorb more and always remind myself that its okay that it is tough now as I am still consider new. Don't stray away from my principles and always stay on track. No matter what others think of me, it doesn't matter as long I know what I am doing. Focus, focus and focus.

2013 will be a great year and hell yeah I am going to rock it!!!! BRING IT ON!!!!

p/s  First lesson of the year, do not drink too much of tea with an empty stomach. Especially when you have low blood pressure.

Grateful

Overhauled by two events back to back last week, leads to exhaustion that cannot even be describe by words. But nevertheless, really glad that we managed to pull it off. Did I mentioned before that the wine dinner was my very first? And I was in charged of wines along with my fellow colleague sommelier, which is a great eye opener for me. Truly grateful for the chance given. 

The team before service starts

And us taking a picture with the winemaker himself after the service ended.

Then comes Xmas decor shopping that was been rushed through in two days during our break time. 12 hours or more of working hours can be incredibly draining mentally and physically, plus toothache ain't helping much either.

After all has been done, appraisal has to come knocking on my door on the very wrong time where I am very hungry and sleepy. Well, honestly speaking no matter what it is, I know I have done my best, I did my job and hell, I shall go through with it. Everything was alright for the first five minutes, then everything went wrong from there. Embarrassed to say this, but I started to cry like a Niagara falls. Not weeping cry, but tears just choose to come out on the wrong time.

Why did I cry? I have been doing my job well i hope, and taking up new challenges as I work.I did not cry because I am stressed, I did not cry because my workload is increasing, but perhaps I cried because I just need a breakdown. I just need to, well damn , it has to be during my appraisal. But at the same time, I am ashamed that I did not find the time to pick up on my wine knowledge which I should. 

Everything that the manager said to me ( hope it is not just to comfort me of course, haha ) was way beyond what I expected it to be and I was truly touched, which leads to me crying more. Bloody hell, I should have hold it up. Everything that I do, I work so hard for, is to have someone to appreciate it. Which someone did, and its, truly overwhelming. 

I will, find the time to study more, to learn more and to work harder in the future. Fingers crossed. 

p/s I received my first bonus! Even if its pro rated, I am grateful enough. ^^

Peace

Not everyone in your life matters,
Hence, you don't live to please everyone.

Be with people who are positive
Be with people who can teach you to be a better person
Be with people who can be your role model

You choose how you live your life
Be it positive, be it negative
You choose to be that way

Don't blame it on god, people for what that had happened
Everything happen for a reason

If you choose to ponder in how miserable your life is, then you will never find gleams of hope in life

For every problem, there will be a solution
The question is, how you find that solution.

Self motivation is the hardest thing to do,
and the easiest.
It is all in your mind.

As for myself now, I choose to be happy, positive and live life with no regrets. To those who shows me attitude and spreading negative energy, I don't give a flying F. Just because you you you sabo me, doesn't mean I have to do that same. Simply just because I am not like you all. That's all.

 

So peace!

p/s I think within this one year in SG, I had grown up a little bit more. Thumbs up to myself! 

We are also humans

We are also human

We have emotions, we have temper just like anyone of you

Because of this, I can't even express myself even if I am really happy. Wtf is this. I have to be cautions on the words I use, my body language, my expression, emotions etc etc. Why? Just because we need to avoid people writing in complain.

There are people who are really nice, and these are the kind of people that we should keep and we should treat them better. And there are also those who are picky and vent it on us. So what should you do? To avoid them to write in, we need to smile, suck it all up and polish their shoes. It is freaking unfair right?

Perhaps this is my first ever complain, hopefully the last. Not entirely picking on me, but, I was part of the story. It sucks, because I like my record clean.

Others rant it on us, it is okay for them, because they are the ones who are paying. Then what about us? Huh? Who shall we go to? Is there a union whereby we can voice out our disapproval?  Even if there is, what can they do? There is no right or wrong, because for them, they are ALWAYS right and we are always at fault. All these negativity will also cause staffs to lose their motivation to work, which will also lead to a domino effect, like losing focus on work, having that 'whatever' attitude, in the end, more complains.

You have a choice, to treat these complains like a 'god', or to motivate your staffs to work better in the future. When I was studying, 'Motivation' is one of the topic that has been repeated so many times through my degree. And indeed, it is very important. Like myself now, I started work full of passion, full of fire on  my work. Now, because of this petty things here and there, I have to admit, I am starting to dislike this field. Motivation, can someone just point it out?

But this is not how it should be isn't it? On personal note, I should never give up until the very end and always try my best. Think of what I did wrong and how I should improve myself, and do better in the future. Even if I have to fake a smile and treat them like god, I still have to make it through right? Yes. I can do it, because I am Yeaw Zhi Lin.

But hopefully in one or two years, and I am out! I told b, I want to live in a country whereby I can experience four seasons at least for a year. I want to see the world! I want to see the world god damn it! haha. Just hope this little dream of mine will because true. Only for a year, not a life time. ( But a life time also not bad eh..^^) Ahhhh...talking nonsense once again. Well, I can't rant it anywhere else. Hence, my trustworthy blog, you are my rant reliever. Thank you!

I wonder

Fair or not? Definitely not fair.

To be angry or not? It is something to be mad about?

Even for a tiny weeny human's emotion, it has to be put under the microscope. What can I say?

Be a smiley robot, and just obey to whichever shit that has been poured?

I suppose that is the only way.

Now I know why FnB Personnel's passion has been put off.

The question is, how to not put off mine?

Think positive, admit my mistakes, and move on.

How long can it last? I wonder

I say you say

My colleague said this one day,

'Money is the easiest thing to find, but the right person is the hardest.'

True that. So many people had been telling me they are lonely and they have't found anyone etc etc. Being a noobie in consulting people, I will always say, the right one will come one day, you just have to wait for it. I don't know how to tell them in a beautiful way that will not hurt their feelings and at the same time they will feel better. So tell me, what will you say if you are in this kind of situation?

I myself, is not really experienced in this thing call 'relationship'. I am grateful that I met him, who is pretty much everything that I am looking for and who has the same view and pace as I am. I am truly thankful for that. I am a lucky girl I must say.

Finding that person who makes your heart flutters, is all about timing, and chemistry, the rest, is fate. And oh, not forgetting one simple rule, grab it before it is gone. You might grab some rotten eggs along the road, but who knows one lucky day you might find an golden egg. Right?

I always believe in one thing, that everything happens for a reason. And all these little reasons will lead to a better cause. But how you choose to accept it and learnt from it, is what that decides your future. Yin and Yang? Cause and Effect? Whichever terms that you want to call it.

I am never a religious person, nor a person who reads a lot of motivational books. I just do what I think is right and how I want to paint my own picture. Stubborn you may call me, but this is how I work. So far, everything is fine no? haha. Well, not exactly a picture perfect portrait, there might be some stains here and there, but that's life isn't it?

Just be positive and keep on going.

I came to Singapore with $300 dollars to survive for a month before my first pay ( which is only half a month's pay to survive for another month ), stayed in a box (literally) with no windows and only yellow lights for 6 months, and hey! I am still surviving and it has been almost a year. Now, the room we are staying is even bigger than my own room in Seremban ( not cheap of course, but definitely worth it considering shelter is a basic necessity in life ) and even manage to save up some money monthly. Not bad isn't it?

So yeap, just some random thoughts before I start rocking the kitchen. Have a great weekend ahead peeps!

My little thoughts

I still remember during my first training in my diploma days, I had my first hands on training in the hospitality industry. What I remembered the most, is that i had this split personality dilemma, whereby I have to be cheery and smiley in front of the customer and when I turn my back, I am back to my normal state of emotions whether it is sad or happy. Then during my second training, it was worst because it was when I was in the window of breaking up. I broke down in the restaurant, I was stressed by the manager ( which is good for my career growth ) and when its time for the restaurant to open, I have to be smiley.

It has been almost 5 years since I jump into this industry and my my, I still felt like I am just a beginner taking baby steps. Other occupations deal with numbers, sick people, sales, we deal with food, people, complaints, sales, skills, wines, relationships etc etc. We work from morning till night, with just a three hours of break in between ( if we are lucky of course ). Screw that 8 working hours window, our working hours is when the restaurant door opens, till it closes at night. Not forgetting, we are standing through the service ( means from the time we are open for lunch/dinner until lunch of dinner ended ). Are we tired? Hell yeah we are.

But not everyone understands that of course and  sometimes they had forgotten that we are humans too. Not sometimes, most of the time. Damn. From their perspectives, they pay for that price and they expect value for money and of course squeeze the most out of it, then only worth it mah ~~~ Very simple example:

You make reservation for 8 person, we arrange the table nicely for you. Then you call again, saying that down to 6 person. We remove one table for you and open up that table for another customer. Later when you reach the restaurant, you said that ohhh, my children wants to tag along as well, so now its back to 8 person. So tell me, where to get another table for you? Then 2 person wants room temperature water, 4 person ice water, then 2 person sparkling water. @@

Similar situation happens on a daily basis and all that we can do, is to endure it and think of a quick solution. So tell me, how to release the mental stress at work? Puffs and alcohol, what else. ( Not me of course. ) With all this mental and physical stress at work, is our pay high? No. Its one of the lowest paid occupation. So tell me, who would want to work in this industry? Its very straight forward. That is also one of the very same reason I choose to work in SG and not in my hometown. Because at least when I convert back, I will still have some savings.

From what I heard from my experienced colleague, this industry used to be really fun and enjoyable. But now, it is much of difficult to endure. Why? Because of the customers. With all the exposures of food  in the media, celebrity chefs rising everywhere, people are learning more about food which is very positive of course. The down side is when your knowledge of it, is just brushing on the surface but you assume that you know plenty. For us, who are working and learning about what we serve on daily basis, we know what we are selling and it is very annoying that people start questioning us on our understanding of our product. And it is very frustrating when people started to demand on extravaganza things and they think that we MUST compliance with that because they are paying the bill. Quote what my colleague said, 'Pay for peanuts ask for gold'.

Sometimes you come to work motivated and happy, but once service started, everything just starting to go downhill because of these problems and people. When this happens, you have to keep motivating yourself, keep cheering yourself up, ignore it and continue back to work. Sometimes when I work, my colleagues ask me, why you look so happy? I always said, of course you must be happy, if not how to work?

If only people can be more understanding.
If only people can learn how to respect us.
If only people can acknowledge that we are also professionals.
If only the F&B scene in Asia can change.

If.......

In a nutshell, somehow I just wish that someone could have educate everyone about this industry so that we can be treated fairly as well. We should be an educator, a messenger to deliver what is the food that they are  having and the know-hows on how to eat them. A person who can make your meal an enjoyable one. Well, this is just my personal thoughts. Not everyone thinks that way of course. So cheers!

Just some thoughts

Hello people...it has been awhile since I updated, blame the little lazy worms in my tummy. Well, nothing much has changed since my last update. It is still work work work and more work. Less conflicts, thank god for that. But, more irritating guests. Jeeeezzzzz..I will compile all my thoughts on that and write another post on it another day, hopefully during my off day. =)

Now I am conflicting between chopping off my hair or leaving it long long long. I kind of missing this =>

Or this...

But I never did have a really nice and wavy long hair before...I always choose to chop it off before I achieve waist length. I guess I don't have that patience to wait for that don't I? My goal now is to grow my hair until my waist length and have big curls. Can it be achieved? My hands are really itchy now and I am missing my short hair. DAMN. Be patient Lin, just let it grow and grow. haha.

People always say enjoy while you are young. You have to work for the rest of your life!!! The thing is, even though monetary is a really abstract thing and people keep saying money cannot buy you happiness, reality is, money is very important. Tell me, what can you do without money?

I had signed up for saving plans which tied me up to ten years, and now still planning on what to do with the rest of my savings. How to set my priorities straight and get it done beautifully. Even though people find me silly, but my nearest goal is to get married. hahaha. Come on, I am already 23++ and one and a half more years to be in my mid twenties. It is not too far right? After that, get a house and start saving for kids education, retirement bla bla bla. Damn! Everything needs money! So tell me, enjoy life or to save up for the future?

So my temporary solution for this is to work my ass off, get promoted and get a raise. Then, if we are fortunate enough to have a good bonus, then use that bonus for a nice good holiday. Sounds like a good plan? 

Okay, complicated issues aside. I miss college life. Damn. 

I miss wearing Formal...

 

I miss all the fun in the kitchen

And I miss all my crazy friends...

Halloween is coming soon...Any plans to dress up everyone?

2009

2010

How much do I miss those days....It was real fun!! So people, if you don't have plans on Halloween, go get a few buddies, dress up and walk around...

Anyways, enough of nonsense...Till another time! 

Rant and rant

Now, I am really tired, fatigue, and exhausted. Any other words to describe how tired I am? This week is hell for us and it is just the beginning, weekend is not even here yet. People who are rude, doesn't understand the importance of punctuality, people who have mood swings and lashes out on staffs, people who are cheapo etc etc. And the worst of all, we have to endure all of this, and return back to work with a smile on the face, even if it is not sincere. Reviews online are good if it is a positive one, but it only takes one negative comment to kill it all. No matter how unfair it is and how freaking you are feeling on the inside, you cannot lash it out on them. Because, they will be the one pointing out every single flaws, whether it is big or small and post it online.

Heck, it is not fair but this is the sad truth of this industry. Customers can have emotions, stress, anger any other negative emotions, but for us, no matter what shit lands on us, once we return back into the service, we have to smile. We are working from morning as early as 10.30 until 10 pm or maybe midnight if we are doing closing shift, 6 days a week. So that is almost 10 hours a day minus our break time in the afternoon. And customers still don't freaking understand that we need to rest in the afternoon before dinner service commence and take their own sweet time chatting with their friends or eating so slow that everything on the plate turns cold and soggy. Sometimes we have so many things to do, paperworks to clear that we don't even have a break in between. So that makes it 12 hours of work everyday!!!

We have to be fast at work, accurate at our work, keep putting on the smiley faces, PR with the guests, carry heavy stuffs, wipe everything from glasses, cutlery etc etc.For someone who is clumsy in nature, me, it is not easy at all. I have to focus and focus more at work and hell, it is very tiring.

No matter how much extra effort I had to put into my work, how much of time and energy I had spent,  can other people see it? Will they appreciate it?

I also want to dress up nicely and go to work. Work in an working environment whereby others respect you for what you do and appreciate all the efforts that had been pour into the work. Don't have to carry heavy things all the time, or sweat like a pig at the end of the day with hair flying everywhere. How I wish others could understand our job, and respect us like how they respect other professionals like doctor or lawyer. By the way, our pay is not even that high, in fact it is very low.

*Sigh*

How I wish I have the influence to change people's perception towards people who works in this industry. One day, one fine day.......

Fool

This will be a purely ranting post. Thank you.

Experienced, but stubborn.

Do nothing but talk a lot.

Want respect, then go earn that respect.

Don't find flaws out of no where and make it a huge scene.

Girls are not that easy to be bullied nowadays, remember that.

I am here to learn something and to achieve something.

Not to be part of some never ending childish act.

You want to play back stab fine, let's see what happens when the lies break apart.

I hardworking or not, busy or not is none of your concern.

I do what I need to do and the only person who needs to know that, is my manager.

Never want to know more, because I don't give a damn.

Your life is in your own hands to paint it black or with colors.

As for mine, I know what I want and I will do anything to achieve my goals.

This, will not stop me no matter how hard it is.

Ignorance is a bliss, and I shall put on the ignorant mask if you step on my tail again.

C'est tout. End of the story.

3rd

Its Our 3rd!!

OMG..it has been almost two months and I have not been blogging about it. I must be really busy working all these while.

Three years...it has been three years already. Time has been passing by so fast that I could not even keep track of it anymore. We were pretty much hung up with moving house, getting use to our new job and voila, its our third anniversary already! Much has been said in the past, much has been expressed, but still, I would like to thank this beautiful man of mine to be by my side all this while.

As age has been catching up ( ahem, I know, I am only 23 this year ) , I might be getting a little naggy and pushy. haha. But, this man is still so patient with me, even though sometimes he might lose it a bit.haha. Pretty understandable if I am in his position honestly. But, I try to think back to myself from time to time and try not be a person that will keep him on his edge all the time. God bless me and him. =)

Fortunately enough, he has a really big and forgiving heart. Well, me too I must say! Muahaha. Just kidding. I am not as polish as him, anyhow, I am still a woman even if I don't behave like one at times. In our third year, its no longer honeymoony, sweety lovey all the time, its time to move on to the next stage. Its all about toleration, understanding, patience and lastly, love. haha. I am not quite sure what am I writing now, but I am pretty sure some of you get it. =p

Being in Singapore for almost a year now, seeing things that I have never seen before, all kinds of relationships. Lust, scandal, confusing complicated relationships, you name it. Its pretty scary really, and it makes me feel relieved to have him by my side. Him as in he who knows what he is doing, he who knows how to think for a better future, he who knows how to treat his girlfriend, he who knows how to love me.

So thank you again, for the thousand million times for choosing me, for bearing with me and for loving me.

Happy Belated Third Anniversary,

And I love you like always, and forever.

Hello..im alive!

Oh hello peeps! Long time never blog ya..well...I had been working nonstop for almost two whole week and tomorrow is finally my off day ! Hooray yay! Thank god for that...my body is really really very tired already..time to rest...and catch on with some movie and reading...:) By the way...I haven't been talking about my new room right? Well...it is great till present...at least we have a proper queen size bed and not a double bunker to squeeze...we have much more space to keep our stuffs and I can even dance around the room..it's pretty awesome..the good thing is..at least I feel like going home after work..like previously..I would have dragged till the very last before I go home..but now..I really feel like going home and rest...even though the rent is slightly higher...but what is more important than having a good rest at home right? We should not stinge on basic necessity like shelter right? I have been pretty relax around my colleagues already and they are finally seeing my true colours...not the quiet one anymore...hahaha..one thing good about living in Singapore..people are very open minded and honest about their relationships..it may be a little too complicated for myself..but really do respect them...as long as you stay true to yourself and pursue your own happiness...nothing is right and wrong...everyone has their own principles to follow and I have mine...love...well...make your own choice and stick with it...like what people always say..life is too short..live with no regrets... I am craving for a good good breakfast or brunch for two with my b..so time to wake the lazy piggy up..that's all for now...till next time... Ps: I'm writing from my iPad..somehow everything just sticks together...aishhh..

Appreciation

Everyone has one story of their own. You may see them being glamorous and gracious on the outside, but deep inside, it may not be the same. I am not a person who knows how to comfort people, nor knowing what to say when others are telling me their story. I only know how to nod my head, and listen. I may be better in writing out then saying it out. That is how I am.

I can be a good listener, but not a good adviser.

To guys out there, always appreciate the person who is standing by your side through ups and downs. There are many distractions out there, but know well who is the one who really treats you well and love you with all their heart. Because once you break their heart, it is very, very hard to mend it back again. No matter how tough is one women, it will break one day if you keep poking it whether intentionally, or not intentionally.

A woman can love you so so much, always put you as their priority without thinking much for themselves. But the tables can be overturn so easily if you don't know how to appreciate that.

As for we women, we need to learn how to love ourselves more.

That is what I learnt today and nope, it is not about me. =)

A short little update

It has been 2 weeks plus since I had started work..and gosh, time really passed by in a blink of eyes. From a quiet girl at work, to a girl who can slowly play around. I found a motivation to work harder and this is something that keeps me going on and on everyday, which I find it very positive. Even though it is very tiring, I hope at the end of the day, it is worth it. Time will tell, give me one year time. =)

Other than working, I had been really upset on my accommodation. It is so depressing as I am constantly whining about it and worst of all, the lights in my room started to fuse one by one. And now, i don't even feel like going home even when I have finished my work earlier. Then when the owner decided to make another partition to rent out for more people, we have decided, this it it! We will forfeited the pety deposit and find somewhere where we can really have a good rest.

After one week of constant searching online, we manage to secure a place, which the rent is a little bit higher, but the room is definitely bigger and we can cook freely. Damn those owners who check on the fridge and being so irresponsible. Contract will be signed this Saturday and hope everything goes on well. Good luck to us! Hope the new place will be better and the people there are good. Fingers crossed.

I need to read my book now. So...that's all for now. =) Hope everyone is doing well..

Rant

This, will be my ranting post. So if you are not a fan of reading someone ranting in their blog, you can avoid this post at all cause. =)

I have been in the new restaurant for one week and damn, politics are flying everywhere. I am trying to be neutral and as humble as I can get in this new job. Partially because everyone else had worked for a longer period compared to me, even the trainee.

I start from the rock bottom, as a food runner. Means the one who serves food only. I know everything needs to follow an order so I don't mind it at all. In fact, I am pretty happy with it. But I had been studying and interning for quite some time and it is not hard for me to understand everything faster than others. But, no matter where you want to put me, I will just listen. And honestly, I don't mind.

I was intro to this company by my ex restaurant manager-aka role model - aka friend and his gf aka ex wine sommelier aka female role model. I had knew them for almost four years now? And they really sayang me to be honest. So when I just joined this new company, I totally understand that others will be curious on our relationship and some may even think that I got this job based on my relationship with them. So, I want to prove them wrong. I want them to know that I am capable person and I get this job because I deserves it.

For me, its very simple. Work is work, when I am at work, I am a serious person. I like things to be in order, I don't like to slack, I like to move when I work. Sitting down relaxing is not my thing. I know I may sound like a workaholic but this is how I work. I am here to learn something and to achieve my goal. I am not here to please everyone and I am certainly not here to entertain anyone.

When others resting during break, I read and do research. Well, even though it is only for one week. haha. But i will try and keep it that way. If you ask me why. Let me tell you why, because my senior intro me this work, the higher management's expectation towards us is higher than the rest. I don't want to let him down and I don't want others to badmouth about my relationship aka friendship with him.

And I found a motivation to work. A motivation to keep me moving forward and help me to set my goal. Thats why I am working really hard now. My manager wants me to join competition next year. Means his expectation of me is also very high. Even though I really don't know why they think so, but I am trying my best not to let anyone down. I study even harder than for University finals. Imagine that.

Just now when I was in my 'zen' mode, I was trying to convince myself to neglect how others look at me and just do what I am suppose to do. Like what my senior said, time will prove them wrong. When they know what you are capable of, they will stop talking. I need to learn how to not care about what other thinks.

So yeaps. That is about it. Finish ranting. =) So, no matter how hard it is, I will hang in there. How I wish human relationship is not this complicated.

Let's start it all over again

Today, is my first day of work at my new work place. Honestly speaking, I am pretty nervous to be in this new job. Partially because in my first work, the we are consider the senior in the restaurant and other than the Manager, we are the ones who trained the part timers and full timers. And now, I need to start fresh whereby everyone else is my senior. @@ Suck it all up, listen to everyone, ask questions, be humble, be good, and that's the way to fight it through for now.

Well, everyone seems to be pretty alienated at first, its very normal as I myself don't like to be overly friendly at  first. Don't ask me why because its just how I am. I am not very good with strangers and people do get me wrong at times. I can sense some politics flying around. Oh well, il be neutral and stay out of trouble. =)

Its good to be working in a proper and organize restaurant again. Thank god! And its good to be back in a French Dining Restaurant. Back to my roots! =) =) Its time to brush up on all my french terminology and polish up my skills. No more kucing kurap type of service, its time to get serious.

I still have a long long way to go, and I need to keep upgrading myself. Learning as I go, practice as I work. It will be pretty tiring at the end of the day, and the outcome may not be as good as other occupation, but i have chosen this path, and there is no turning back. I can only look forward and believe in what I believe at first. That one fine day, I will prove to the rest that working in this industry, is also a profession and others should respect us as a professional.

Alright, let's hope things will be better as time goes by. For now, il slowly adjust to my new working timing and hope i will have more life soon. haha. ciaos people

That guy

I believe that everyone has their own imaginary Prince/Princess, or in another words Ideal Guy/Girl. Different people seek for different qualities that attracts them to that special individual. Like wise myself, if you look into my past, none of them resembles each other, they are very different when it comes to physical and personality wise.

I am a person who very much look into 'feeling' or that very special something that attracts me and it can be anything.I cannot define to you what kind of 'feeling', because that is up to each individual I suppose. It's like some sort of chemistry that cannot be explain by words, just that special feeling.

Like b, I am first attracted to him because rather than my loud friends, he is a quiet and good looking guy sitting at a corner of the classroom. He is surrounded by that mysterious aura that attracts me to dig in further. I still remember that day when I shed tears in class and was noticed by him. That awkward moment when I just want to run away and hide myself. Then, he turns out to be a very smart guy ( One of the smartest guy that I have known in college ), and a very caring person who cares about me when the person next to me doesn't give a damn. 

We both knew we had something, well, I was being ticked off by my friend, but it is still counted nevertheless =p, and that very same day he asked me to be his girlfriend, was the most nerve wrecking and romantic moment in my life. And after three years, it is still fresh and vivid in my mind.

Every couple has their own ways of handling relationship. We don't have to fight or argue to know each other better, we don't have to be very adventurous, we don't have to be lovey dovey all the time. We see each other every day, we have our quiet moments, we have our sweet moments and we understand each other, that is all that counts. 

I don't need a relationship that is like a roller coaster ride, a relationship that makes everyone jealous. What I need, is very simple, someone who love me for who I am, and someone who is willing to hold my hands till the end. 

No matter how much we had grew and changed in this journey, I am glad that you are by my side darling. 

And for the hundred and thousand times, I love you Baby Aaron.