Grateful

Overhauled by two events back to back last week, leads to exhaustion that cannot even be describe by words. But nevertheless, really glad that we managed to pull it off. Did I mentioned before that the wine dinner was my very first? And I was in charged of wines along with my fellow colleague sommelier, which is a great eye opener for me. Truly grateful for the chance given. 

The team before service starts

And us taking a picture with the winemaker himself after the service ended.

Then comes Xmas decor shopping that was been rushed through in two days during our break time. 12 hours or more of working hours can be incredibly draining mentally and physically, plus toothache ain't helping much either.

After all has been done, appraisal has to come knocking on my door on the very wrong time where I am very hungry and sleepy. Well, honestly speaking no matter what it is, I know I have done my best, I did my job and hell, I shall go through with it. Everything was alright for the first five minutes, then everything went wrong from there. Embarrassed to say this, but I started to cry like a Niagara falls. Not weeping cry, but tears just choose to come out on the wrong time.

Why did I cry? I have been doing my job well i hope, and taking up new challenges as I work.I did not cry because I am stressed, I did not cry because my workload is increasing, but perhaps I cried because I just need a breakdown. I just need to, well damn , it has to be during my appraisal. But at the same time, I am ashamed that I did not find the time to pick up on my wine knowledge which I should. 

Everything that the manager said to me ( hope it is not just to comfort me of course, haha ) was way beyond what I expected it to be and I was truly touched, which leads to me crying more. Bloody hell, I should have hold it up. Everything that I do, I work so hard for, is to have someone to appreciate it. Which someone did, and its, truly overwhelming. 

I will, find the time to study more, to learn more and to work harder in the future. Fingers crossed. 

p/s I received my first bonus! Even if its pro rated, I am grateful enough. ^^

Peace

Not everyone in your life matters,
Hence, you don't live to please everyone.

Be with people who are positive
Be with people who can teach you to be a better person
Be with people who can be your role model

You choose how you live your life
Be it positive, be it negative
You choose to be that way

Don't blame it on god, people for what that had happened
Everything happen for a reason

If you choose to ponder in how miserable your life is, then you will never find gleams of hope in life

For every problem, there will be a solution
The question is, how you find that solution.

Self motivation is the hardest thing to do,
and the easiest.
It is all in your mind.

As for myself now, I choose to be happy, positive and live life with no regrets. To those who shows me attitude and spreading negative energy, I don't give a flying F. Just because you you you sabo me, doesn't mean I have to do that same. Simply just because I am not like you all. That's all.

 

So peace!

p/s I think within this one year in SG, I had grown up a little bit more. Thumbs up to myself! 

We are also humans

We are also human

We have emotions, we have temper just like anyone of you

Because of this, I can't even express myself even if I am really happy. Wtf is this. I have to be cautions on the words I use, my body language, my expression, emotions etc etc. Why? Just because we need to avoid people writing in complain.

There are people who are really nice, and these are the kind of people that we should keep and we should treat them better. And there are also those who are picky and vent it on us. So what should you do? To avoid them to write in, we need to smile, suck it all up and polish their shoes. It is freaking unfair right?

Perhaps this is my first ever complain, hopefully the last. Not entirely picking on me, but, I was part of the story. It sucks, because I like my record clean.

Others rant it on us, it is okay for them, because they are the ones who are paying. Then what about us? Huh? Who shall we go to? Is there a union whereby we can voice out our disapproval?  Even if there is, what can they do? There is no right or wrong, because for them, they are ALWAYS right and we are always at fault. All these negativity will also cause staffs to lose their motivation to work, which will also lead to a domino effect, like losing focus on work, having that 'whatever' attitude, in the end, more complains.

You have a choice, to treat these complains like a 'god', or to motivate your staffs to work better in the future. When I was studying, 'Motivation' is one of the topic that has been repeated so many times through my degree. And indeed, it is very important. Like myself now, I started work full of passion, full of fire on  my work. Now, because of this petty things here and there, I have to admit, I am starting to dislike this field. Motivation, can someone just point it out?

But this is not how it should be isn't it? On personal note, I should never give up until the very end and always try my best. Think of what I did wrong and how I should improve myself, and do better in the future. Even if I have to fake a smile and treat them like god, I still have to make it through right? Yes. I can do it, because I am Yeaw Zhi Lin.

But hopefully in one or two years, and I am out! I told b, I want to live in a country whereby I can experience four seasons at least for a year. I want to see the world! I want to see the world god damn it! haha. Just hope this little dream of mine will because true. Only for a year, not a life time. ( But a life time also not bad eh..^^) Ahhhh...talking nonsense once again. Well, I can't rant it anywhere else. Hence, my trustworthy blog, you are my rant reliever. Thank you!

I wonder

Fair or not? Definitely not fair.

To be angry or not? It is something to be mad about?

Even for a tiny weeny human's emotion, it has to be put under the microscope. What can I say?

Be a smiley robot, and just obey to whichever shit that has been poured?

I suppose that is the only way.

Now I know why FnB Personnel's passion has been put off.

The question is, how to not put off mine?

Think positive, admit my mistakes, and move on.

How long can it last? I wonder

I say you say

My colleague said this one day,

'Money is the easiest thing to find, but the right person is the hardest.'

True that. So many people had been telling me they are lonely and they have't found anyone etc etc. Being a noobie in consulting people, I will always say, the right one will come one day, you just have to wait for it. I don't know how to tell them in a beautiful way that will not hurt their feelings and at the same time they will feel better. So tell me, what will you say if you are in this kind of situation?

I myself, is not really experienced in this thing call 'relationship'. I am grateful that I met him, who is pretty much everything that I am looking for and who has the same view and pace as I am. I am truly thankful for that. I am a lucky girl I must say.

Finding that person who makes your heart flutters, is all about timing, and chemistry, the rest, is fate. And oh, not forgetting one simple rule, grab it before it is gone. You might grab some rotten eggs along the road, but who knows one lucky day you might find an golden egg. Right?

I always believe in one thing, that everything happens for a reason. And all these little reasons will lead to a better cause. But how you choose to accept it and learnt from it, is what that decides your future. Yin and Yang? Cause and Effect? Whichever terms that you want to call it.

I am never a religious person, nor a person who reads a lot of motivational books. I just do what I think is right and how I want to paint my own picture. Stubborn you may call me, but this is how I work. So far, everything is fine no? haha. Well, not exactly a picture perfect portrait, there might be some stains here and there, but that's life isn't it?

Just be positive and keep on going.

I came to Singapore with $300 dollars to survive for a month before my first pay ( which is only half a month's pay to survive for another month ), stayed in a box (literally) with no windows and only yellow lights for 6 months, and hey! I am still surviving and it has been almost a year. Now, the room we are staying is even bigger than my own room in Seremban ( not cheap of course, but definitely worth it considering shelter is a basic necessity in life ) and even manage to save up some money monthly. Not bad isn't it?

So yeap, just some random thoughts before I start rocking the kitchen. Have a great weekend ahead peeps!

My little thoughts

I still remember during my first training in my diploma days, I had my first hands on training in the hospitality industry. What I remembered the most, is that i had this split personality dilemma, whereby I have to be cheery and smiley in front of the customer and when I turn my back, I am back to my normal state of emotions whether it is sad or happy. Then during my second training, it was worst because it was when I was in the window of breaking up. I broke down in the restaurant, I was stressed by the manager ( which is good for my career growth ) and when its time for the restaurant to open, I have to be smiley.

It has been almost 5 years since I jump into this industry and my my, I still felt like I am just a beginner taking baby steps. Other occupations deal with numbers, sick people, sales, we deal with food, people, complaints, sales, skills, wines, relationships etc etc. We work from morning till night, with just a three hours of break in between ( if we are lucky of course ). Screw that 8 working hours window, our working hours is when the restaurant door opens, till it closes at night. Not forgetting, we are standing through the service ( means from the time we are open for lunch/dinner until lunch of dinner ended ). Are we tired? Hell yeah we are.

But not everyone understands that of course and  sometimes they had forgotten that we are humans too. Not sometimes, most of the time. Damn. From their perspectives, they pay for that price and they expect value for money and of course squeeze the most out of it, then only worth it mah ~~~ Very simple example:

You make reservation for 8 person, we arrange the table nicely for you. Then you call again, saying that down to 6 person. We remove one table for you and open up that table for another customer. Later when you reach the restaurant, you said that ohhh, my children wants to tag along as well, so now its back to 8 person. So tell me, where to get another table for you? Then 2 person wants room temperature water, 4 person ice water, then 2 person sparkling water. @@

Similar situation happens on a daily basis and all that we can do, is to endure it and think of a quick solution. So tell me, how to release the mental stress at work? Puffs and alcohol, what else. ( Not me of course. ) With all this mental and physical stress at work, is our pay high? No. Its one of the lowest paid occupation. So tell me, who would want to work in this industry? Its very straight forward. That is also one of the very same reason I choose to work in SG and not in my hometown. Because at least when I convert back, I will still have some savings.

From what I heard from my experienced colleague, this industry used to be really fun and enjoyable. But now, it is much of difficult to endure. Why? Because of the customers. With all the exposures of food  in the media, celebrity chefs rising everywhere, people are learning more about food which is very positive of course. The down side is when your knowledge of it, is just brushing on the surface but you assume that you know plenty. For us, who are working and learning about what we serve on daily basis, we know what we are selling and it is very annoying that people start questioning us on our understanding of our product. And it is very frustrating when people started to demand on extravaganza things and they think that we MUST compliance with that because they are paying the bill. Quote what my colleague said, 'Pay for peanuts ask for gold'.

Sometimes you come to work motivated and happy, but once service started, everything just starting to go downhill because of these problems and people. When this happens, you have to keep motivating yourself, keep cheering yourself up, ignore it and continue back to work. Sometimes when I work, my colleagues ask me, why you look so happy? I always said, of course you must be happy, if not how to work?

If only people can be more understanding.
If only people can learn how to respect us.
If only people can acknowledge that we are also professionals.
If only the F&B scene in Asia can change.

If.......

In a nutshell, somehow I just wish that someone could have educate everyone about this industry so that we can be treated fairly as well. We should be an educator, a messenger to deliver what is the food that they are  having and the know-hows on how to eat them. A person who can make your meal an enjoyable one. Well, this is just my personal thoughts. Not everyone thinks that way of course. So cheers!

Just some thoughts

Hello people...it has been awhile since I updated, blame the little lazy worms in my tummy. Well, nothing much has changed since my last update. It is still work work work and more work. Less conflicts, thank god for that. But, more irritating guests. Jeeeezzzzz..I will compile all my thoughts on that and write another post on it another day, hopefully during my off day. =)

Now I am conflicting between chopping off my hair or leaving it long long long. I kind of missing this =>

Or this...

But I never did have a really nice and wavy long hair before...I always choose to chop it off before I achieve waist length. I guess I don't have that patience to wait for that don't I? My goal now is to grow my hair until my waist length and have big curls. Can it be achieved? My hands are really itchy now and I am missing my short hair. DAMN. Be patient Lin, just let it grow and grow. haha.

People always say enjoy while you are young. You have to work for the rest of your life!!! The thing is, even though monetary is a really abstract thing and people keep saying money cannot buy you happiness, reality is, money is very important. Tell me, what can you do without money?

I had signed up for saving plans which tied me up to ten years, and now still planning on what to do with the rest of my savings. How to set my priorities straight and get it done beautifully. Even though people find me silly, but my nearest goal is to get married. hahaha. Come on, I am already 23++ and one and a half more years to be in my mid twenties. It is not too far right? After that, get a house and start saving for kids education, retirement bla bla bla. Damn! Everything needs money! So tell me, enjoy life or to save up for the future?

So my temporary solution for this is to work my ass off, get promoted and get a raise. Then, if we are fortunate enough to have a good bonus, then use that bonus for a nice good holiday. Sounds like a good plan? 

Okay, complicated issues aside. I miss college life. Damn. 

I miss wearing Formal...

 

I miss all the fun in the kitchen

And I miss all my crazy friends...

Halloween is coming soon...Any plans to dress up everyone?

2009

2010

How much do I miss those days....It was real fun!! So people, if you don't have plans on Halloween, go get a few buddies, dress up and walk around...

Anyways, enough of nonsense...Till another time! 

Rant and rant

Now, I am really tired, fatigue, and exhausted. Any other words to describe how tired I am? This week is hell for us and it is just the beginning, weekend is not even here yet. People who are rude, doesn't understand the importance of punctuality, people who have mood swings and lashes out on staffs, people who are cheapo etc etc. And the worst of all, we have to endure all of this, and return back to work with a smile on the face, even if it is not sincere. Reviews online are good if it is a positive one, but it only takes one negative comment to kill it all. No matter how unfair it is and how freaking you are feeling on the inside, you cannot lash it out on them. Because, they will be the one pointing out every single flaws, whether it is big or small and post it online.

Heck, it is not fair but this is the sad truth of this industry. Customers can have emotions, stress, anger any other negative emotions, but for us, no matter what shit lands on us, once we return back into the service, we have to smile. We are working from morning as early as 10.30 until 10 pm or maybe midnight if we are doing closing shift, 6 days a week. So that is almost 10 hours a day minus our break time in the afternoon. And customers still don't freaking understand that we need to rest in the afternoon before dinner service commence and take their own sweet time chatting with their friends or eating so slow that everything on the plate turns cold and soggy. Sometimes we have so many things to do, paperworks to clear that we don't even have a break in between. So that makes it 12 hours of work everyday!!!

We have to be fast at work, accurate at our work, keep putting on the smiley faces, PR with the guests, carry heavy stuffs, wipe everything from glasses, cutlery etc etc.For someone who is clumsy in nature, me, it is not easy at all. I have to focus and focus more at work and hell, it is very tiring.

No matter how much extra effort I had to put into my work, how much of time and energy I had spent,  can other people see it? Will they appreciate it?

I also want to dress up nicely and go to work. Work in an working environment whereby others respect you for what you do and appreciate all the efforts that had been pour into the work. Don't have to carry heavy things all the time, or sweat like a pig at the end of the day with hair flying everywhere. How I wish others could understand our job, and respect us like how they respect other professionals like doctor or lawyer. By the way, our pay is not even that high, in fact it is very low.

*Sigh*

How I wish I have the influence to change people's perception towards people who works in this industry. One day, one fine day.......

Fool

This will be a purely ranting post. Thank you.

Experienced, but stubborn.

Do nothing but talk a lot.

Want respect, then go earn that respect.

Don't find flaws out of no where and make it a huge scene.

Girls are not that easy to be bullied nowadays, remember that.

I am here to learn something and to achieve something.

Not to be part of some never ending childish act.

You want to play back stab fine, let's see what happens when the lies break apart.

I hardworking or not, busy or not is none of your concern.

I do what I need to do and the only person who needs to know that, is my manager.

Never want to know more, because I don't give a damn.

Your life is in your own hands to paint it black or with colors.

As for mine, I know what I want and I will do anything to achieve my goals.

This, will not stop me no matter how hard it is.

Ignorance is a bliss, and I shall put on the ignorant mask if you step on my tail again.

C'est tout. End of the story.

3rd

Its Our 3rd!!

OMG..it has been almost two months and I have not been blogging about it. I must be really busy working all these while.

Three years...it has been three years already. Time has been passing by so fast that I could not even keep track of it anymore. We were pretty much hung up with moving house, getting use to our new job and voila, its our third anniversary already! Much has been said in the past, much has been expressed, but still, I would like to thank this beautiful man of mine to be by my side all this while.

As age has been catching up ( ahem, I know, I am only 23 this year ) , I might be getting a little naggy and pushy. haha. But, this man is still so patient with me, even though sometimes he might lose it a bit.haha. Pretty understandable if I am in his position honestly. But, I try to think back to myself from time to time and try not be a person that will keep him on his edge all the time. God bless me and him. =)

Fortunately enough, he has a really big and forgiving heart. Well, me too I must say! Muahaha. Just kidding. I am not as polish as him, anyhow, I am still a woman even if I don't behave like one at times. In our third year, its no longer honeymoony, sweety lovey all the time, its time to move on to the next stage. Its all about toleration, understanding, patience and lastly, love. haha. I am not quite sure what am I writing now, but I am pretty sure some of you get it. =p

Being in Singapore for almost a year now, seeing things that I have never seen before, all kinds of relationships. Lust, scandal, confusing complicated relationships, you name it. Its pretty scary really, and it makes me feel relieved to have him by my side. Him as in he who knows what he is doing, he who knows how to think for a better future, he who knows how to treat his girlfriend, he who knows how to love me.

So thank you again, for the thousand million times for choosing me, for bearing with me and for loving me.

Happy Belated Third Anniversary,

And I love you like always, and forever.

Hello..im alive!

Oh hello peeps! Long time never blog ya..well...I had been working nonstop for almost two whole week and tomorrow is finally my off day ! Hooray yay! Thank god for that...my body is really really very tired already..time to rest...and catch on with some movie and reading...:) By the way...I haven't been talking about my new room right? Well...it is great till present...at least we have a proper queen size bed and not a double bunker to squeeze...we have much more space to keep our stuffs and I can even dance around the room..it's pretty awesome..the good thing is..at least I feel like going home after work..like previously..I would have dragged till the very last before I go home..but now..I really feel like going home and rest...even though the rent is slightly higher...but what is more important than having a good rest at home right? We should not stinge on basic necessity like shelter right? I have been pretty relax around my colleagues already and they are finally seeing my true colours...not the quiet one anymore...hahaha..one thing good about living in Singapore..people are very open minded and honest about their relationships..it may be a little too complicated for myself..but really do respect them...as long as you stay true to yourself and pursue your own happiness...nothing is right and wrong...everyone has their own principles to follow and I have mine...love...well...make your own choice and stick with it...like what people always say..life is too short..live with no regrets... I am craving for a good good breakfast or brunch for two with my b..so time to wake the lazy piggy up..that's all for now...till next time... Ps: I'm writing from my iPad..somehow everything just sticks together...aishhh..

Appreciation

Everyone has one story of their own. You may see them being glamorous and gracious on the outside, but deep inside, it may not be the same. I am not a person who knows how to comfort people, nor knowing what to say when others are telling me their story. I only know how to nod my head, and listen. I may be better in writing out then saying it out. That is how I am.

I can be a good listener, but not a good adviser.

To guys out there, always appreciate the person who is standing by your side through ups and downs. There are many distractions out there, but know well who is the one who really treats you well and love you with all their heart. Because once you break their heart, it is very, very hard to mend it back again. No matter how tough is one women, it will break one day if you keep poking it whether intentionally, or not intentionally.

A woman can love you so so much, always put you as their priority without thinking much for themselves. But the tables can be overturn so easily if you don't know how to appreciate that.

As for we women, we need to learn how to love ourselves more.

That is what I learnt today and nope, it is not about me. =)

A short little update

It has been 2 weeks plus since I had started work..and gosh, time really passed by in a blink of eyes. From a quiet girl at work, to a girl who can slowly play around. I found a motivation to work harder and this is something that keeps me going on and on everyday, which I find it very positive. Even though it is very tiring, I hope at the end of the day, it is worth it. Time will tell, give me one year time. =)

Other than working, I had been really upset on my accommodation. It is so depressing as I am constantly whining about it and worst of all, the lights in my room started to fuse one by one. And now, i don't even feel like going home even when I have finished my work earlier. Then when the owner decided to make another partition to rent out for more people, we have decided, this it it! We will forfeited the pety deposit and find somewhere where we can really have a good rest.

After one week of constant searching online, we manage to secure a place, which the rent is a little bit higher, but the room is definitely bigger and we can cook freely. Damn those owners who check on the fridge and being so irresponsible. Contract will be signed this Saturday and hope everything goes on well. Good luck to us! Hope the new place will be better and the people there are good. Fingers crossed.

I need to read my book now. So...that's all for now. =) Hope everyone is doing well..

Rant

This, will be my ranting post. So if you are not a fan of reading someone ranting in their blog, you can avoid this post at all cause. =)

I have been in the new restaurant for one week and damn, politics are flying everywhere. I am trying to be neutral and as humble as I can get in this new job. Partially because everyone else had worked for a longer period compared to me, even the trainee.

I start from the rock bottom, as a food runner. Means the one who serves food only. I know everything needs to follow an order so I don't mind it at all. In fact, I am pretty happy with it. But I had been studying and interning for quite some time and it is not hard for me to understand everything faster than others. But, no matter where you want to put me, I will just listen. And honestly, I don't mind.

I was intro to this company by my ex restaurant manager-aka role model - aka friend and his gf aka ex wine sommelier aka female role model. I had knew them for almost four years now? And they really sayang me to be honest. So when I just joined this new company, I totally understand that others will be curious on our relationship and some may even think that I got this job based on my relationship with them. So, I want to prove them wrong. I want them to know that I am capable person and I get this job because I deserves it.

For me, its very simple. Work is work, when I am at work, I am a serious person. I like things to be in order, I don't like to slack, I like to move when I work. Sitting down relaxing is not my thing. I know I may sound like a workaholic but this is how I work. I am here to learn something and to achieve my goal. I am not here to please everyone and I am certainly not here to entertain anyone.

When others resting during break, I read and do research. Well, even though it is only for one week. haha. But i will try and keep it that way. If you ask me why. Let me tell you why, because my senior intro me this work, the higher management's expectation towards us is higher than the rest. I don't want to let him down and I don't want others to badmouth about my relationship aka friendship with him.

And I found a motivation to work. A motivation to keep me moving forward and help me to set my goal. Thats why I am working really hard now. My manager wants me to join competition next year. Means his expectation of me is also very high. Even though I really don't know why they think so, but I am trying my best not to let anyone down. I study even harder than for University finals. Imagine that.

Just now when I was in my 'zen' mode, I was trying to convince myself to neglect how others look at me and just do what I am suppose to do. Like what my senior said, time will prove them wrong. When they know what you are capable of, they will stop talking. I need to learn how to not care about what other thinks.

So yeaps. That is about it. Finish ranting. =) So, no matter how hard it is, I will hang in there. How I wish human relationship is not this complicated.

Let's start it all over again

Today, is my first day of work at my new work place. Honestly speaking, I am pretty nervous to be in this new job. Partially because in my first work, the we are consider the senior in the restaurant and other than the Manager, we are the ones who trained the part timers and full timers. And now, I need to start fresh whereby everyone else is my senior. @@ Suck it all up, listen to everyone, ask questions, be humble, be good, and that's the way to fight it through for now.

Well, everyone seems to be pretty alienated at first, its very normal as I myself don't like to be overly friendly at  first. Don't ask me why because its just how I am. I am not very good with strangers and people do get me wrong at times. I can sense some politics flying around. Oh well, il be neutral and stay out of trouble. =)

Its good to be working in a proper and organize restaurant again. Thank god! And its good to be back in a French Dining Restaurant. Back to my roots! =) =) Its time to brush up on all my french terminology and polish up my skills. No more kucing kurap type of service, its time to get serious.

I still have a long long way to go, and I need to keep upgrading myself. Learning as I go, practice as I work. It will be pretty tiring at the end of the day, and the outcome may not be as good as other occupation, but i have chosen this path, and there is no turning back. I can only look forward and believe in what I believe at first. That one fine day, I will prove to the rest that working in this industry, is also a profession and others should respect us as a professional.

Alright, let's hope things will be better as time goes by. For now, il slowly adjust to my new working timing and hope i will have more life soon. haha. ciaos people

That guy

I believe that everyone has their own imaginary Prince/Princess, or in another words Ideal Guy/Girl. Different people seek for different qualities that attracts them to that special individual. Like wise myself, if you look into my past, none of them resembles each other, they are very different when it comes to physical and personality wise.

I am a person who very much look into 'feeling' or that very special something that attracts me and it can be anything.I cannot define to you what kind of 'feeling', because that is up to each individual I suppose. It's like some sort of chemistry that cannot be explain by words, just that special feeling.

Like b, I am first attracted to him because rather than my loud friends, he is a quiet and good looking guy sitting at a corner of the classroom. He is surrounded by that mysterious aura that attracts me to dig in further. I still remember that day when I shed tears in class and was noticed by him. That awkward moment when I just want to run away and hide myself. Then, he turns out to be a very smart guy ( One of the smartest guy that I have known in college ), and a very caring person who cares about me when the person next to me doesn't give a damn. 

We both knew we had something, well, I was being ticked off by my friend, but it is still counted nevertheless =p, and that very same day he asked me to be his girlfriend, was the most nerve wrecking and romantic moment in my life. And after three years, it is still fresh and vivid in my mind.

Every couple has their own ways of handling relationship. We don't have to fight or argue to know each other better, we don't have to be very adventurous, we don't have to be lovey dovey all the time. We see each other every day, we have our quiet moments, we have our sweet moments and we understand each other, that is all that counts. 

I don't need a relationship that is like a roller coaster ride, a relationship that makes everyone jealous. What I need, is very simple, someone who love me for who I am, and someone who is willing to hold my hands till the end. 

No matter how much we had grew and changed in this journey, I am glad that you are by my side darling. 

And for the hundred and thousand times, I love you Baby Aaron. 

It's official

Graduation..

The feeling of becoming a graduate is not as strong as before, because I had already jumped into the working life. Therefore, the excitement of leaving University, completed all exams and assignments, feeling proud because I can finally close one chapter of life is not as strong as before.Nevertheless, I am excited to see my friends again.

Those four years of meeting new friends, attending lectures, rushing assignments, sitting for exams after exams, fell in love and fallen out of love, the emotional roller coaster, becoming more tough and independent, these memories will always stay with me forever.

Life is like a puzzle. You slowly fill in the puzzle one by one. When it does not match, no matter how much you force it to, it just won't fit it. Then you will have to start looking for the right match.You may feel frustrated, angry and sometimes even disappointed, but you will slowly get the pace and it will be better as time goes by. ( I have no idea why I want to talk about puzzle here. hahaha. Out of topic. Opps )

Now, I can finally close this chapter of my life, with pictures and memories as a proof. And now, let the real journey begin. The long long journey of building career and family. =)

Million and billion thanks to these special people who had been there for me...=)

My family who had been supporting me all the way. 

B's family who had given me great advice and love. =)

My ex Roomie Mich who gave me endless support...=)

Kee Shen..the smartest and most wise guy I have ever known..

My classmates who are always smiley and fun to talk with..=)

And to this very special guy, who had walked with me for three years, and now Graduation. I am glad that we can graduate together and utterly happy that you are always by my side. Love you b..=)

Now, I need to focus in building up my career, learn as much as I can and go as far as I can. Learn how to manage my money better, and learn how to be a better girlfriend. haha. 

So many things that I want to do and so many things that I should do. So now, focus, and I can do it! =)

GRADUATION? DONE-D

Selfish People

Before I blog about my Convocation, I need to release some steam first. Okay before I go into anything,I want to say that I admit that I am not be a overly friendly or helpful housemates. At home, I am a very private person. Home is a place where I rest my feet after work, not feel stress and relax. Hence, I don't like to socialize around, I just want to rest and do my own things. Especially in a foreign land where I don't even know my housemates, I do not find the obligation to be close to you. I already smiled to customers for the whole day in the restaurant, I don't have to do that at home when I don't feel like it, except to B of course. So yes, I am not a housemate friendly person here.

The thing is there are certain people who thinks they are O-Mighty, O-SO-GREAT in the house. Firstly, YOU TWO are clean freaks, we are not. So if you want to clean wherever whatever, do not aspect everyone to do so. At first, there is a mop that I can use to mop the corridor. But apparently they kept it for themselves because it is theirs and they do not want to share. Okay fine, since you don't want to share, il just get a cheap one to clean our own room. If you guys are nice enough, I will clean it from time to time. But sorry, you are not. So I don't give a damn.

Secondly, Yes I know, we are not allow to cook at home, so what? You yourself cook from time to time, just not as frequent as us. The kitchen was already in a wreck and freaking dirty before we start using, so please do not tell me to always keep things clean in the kitchen when you are not using it. You are using the dining hall to cook, so mind your own business. We already tried to clean as much as we can, and we do not have THAT much of free time to clean the entire place!

Thirdly, you want to complain about us moving your clothes from the washing machine. Go ahead. Who is the selfish one who left it in the washing machine and went out without thinking others might want to use it? And, did the same two days in a row. YOU are a clean freak, and needs to wash your clothes every single day and uses most of the space. When we take out out clothes, you will take our space and where the hell am I going to hang my clothes if we need to? So to hell, I will only remove mine when I feel like removing. What are you going to say about it? We took up all the space?  Oh sorry, who is the one who washes clothes like you have been away for months after coming back from holiday and needed to wash for at at least four five rounds after you all came back?? And even told us that you need to use the entire space? Oh please, please look at the mirror!

Fourthly, our house is already freaking small, and you two keep bringing people back. Some even stayed for days. Okay, I don't mind. But F man, people want to rest after work, you guys make a hell of a noise like at some party. Sometimes even during midnight! Even if you don't have to work, others need to. Selfish like nobody's business. I don't even complain to the owner about it! I should have!

Fifth, I know you two like to fight and argue, you want to fight, fight in somewhere with just two of you. Don't pretend like we are invisible! The walls are too thin and we can hear everything. You want to slam the door, hit the pillow, do it in discreet. You don't want to embarrassed yourself.

Sixth, You want to curse us or anything, do you have to do it all loud and make sure that we can hear? Oh my! How low you are to do so. Just because we did not do the same, or did not respond, doesn't mean we cannot hear.

Seventh, You two like to curse people, like to use rude words, well go ahead. That will only reflect on yourself. Job well done and I hope you do well in life.

It is DAMN FREAKING ANNOYING to have this kind of housemates. Maybe they find the same about us, but I don't freaking care. If it is not because of the damn deposit, we would have move out right away. I have five months to go, FIVE STRESSING MONTHS. Damn. Sorry for being whinny, but I just to find somewhere to lash out my dissatisfaction.

Next time il make sure I get a way better room and quieter place where I can really relax after work. The basic necessity, shelter. I should keep that in mind. Money, is secondary.

Yesterday was my last day at work, and it was like any other days. Finish work, go home. It wasn't like a very emotional good bye, hugging each other and stuffs. I am working in a very 'manly' working environment whereby its just a very cool, 'good bye and all the best in the future' last day. Come to think of it, in most of my training or internship, I do not have much attachment with company, except for one. Maybe it was too short for me to feel very attach to it. Nevertheless, I am over and done with it.

Walking home after finishing work was very 'light'. I felt like as though a heavy weight was lifted up my shoulders. Now, I can finally enjoy two weeks of being unemployed, literally, before opening a new chapter of my life. 

I was browsing through online to search for the best place to go for a short holiday yesterday. Everywhere from Star Cruise ( It is bloooody expensive. TT), Bintan Island, any islands around Singapore, Pular Besar, Pulau Rawa and stuffs, but none really catches my eye. Either it is really expensive, or too troublesome to get by ( Like Pulau Rawa, I need to get to Johor then find a bus which will take around 4 hours to reach Mersing Jetty then take another ferry of 40 minutes to reach the island.) It is very tiring and not what I am looking for.

I need a place, where I can relax, get away from the city life, and of course, with good food. Well, I am not going to starve myself during holiday don't I? Then I am like wth, let's see what tiger airway offers. And surprisingly, ticket to Phuket is only around 100+ for one person even though I am planning to fly next week. Okay, fine book! The only problem is when I was booking my hotel, I mistakenly thought that the price listed was 100 dollar for three nights and believe that the 'NO CANCELLATION FEES' was real. But, it was too good to be true. At the end of the day, that 100 dollars was the price for one night. @@ 

After self comforting myself, why not right? Since the hotel looks very nice and the reviews on tripadvisor is good, why not. I already made a last minute decision to go on a holiday, and we can still afford it, just go for it. Tell myself, don't be too stingy. After all, we have been working nonstop without any holiday for six months ( except for CNY). It is time to relaxxxxxx~ =)

So I am going back to Malaysia tomorrow. Saturday Girlfriend session, then Sunday Convocation plus family dinner. YEAHU! Can't wait. And, Thursday we are flying off to PHUKETTTT! How awesome is my holiday! Alright. I know I am mumbling too much now. Time to go out! Ciaos people

A change is good, its always good no?
People come and go, Opportunities come and go
When it comes knocking on your door,
Grab it before it is gone

I believe that in life, everything happen for a reason
Good choice or not, you will still learn something from it
So let's see what is in house for me.

My health has been a little mind blobbing recently
Running fourth between flu, cough and headache
Is it the weather? Or it's a sign that I should take care of my body more
*sigh*

Asia Laksa, Nasi Lemak, Banana Leaf, BKT, Roti
Hello everyone, I will be coming to you in two weeks time
Please wait for me. ^^

Convocation in two weeks time
Dress bought, Hair dyed
Now left contact lenses, and heels
Its a once in a life time thing, it should be perfect
It must be...

My head is killing me now
Time to lie down and let it cool down
Let's hope it will be better tomorrow.

New Motivation

I am always a person who plan ahead of time, thinking what to do next, what to eat etc etc. But in career wise, everything was put on hold once I came to Singapore. Previously, what I want was to start off my career in Singapore and I had achieved that. So what is next? I am always thinking what is next, but honestly speaking, I have no idea. 

I know I am always complaining about work, because it is indeed frustrating. My initial plan was to stay within the company for one year, and move on to my next stop. Till then, I will suck it in, and stay at where I am now.

If you have read my blog since long long time ago, you would have notice I had mentioned about this senior that I worked with last time, actually not only one, but one couple. When I was young and naive, they sort of bash me up in a good way of course, and ever since then, I always put them as my role model. I even went back for part time a few times, not because I love that company particularly, its because I enjoy working with them. 

Somehow, all of us ended up in Singapore now. Having lunch with them makes me realize that hey, that is what I am suppose to do, not serving breakfast with endless complains and not able to do what I want to do! I should be doing something with better career advancement, I should be uplift myself, I should work hard to be somebody, not just a small peanut in a company! I can do better than this! I should!

I always have this plan in my head, but I don't have the guts to pursue it because I need to start from scratch. Others had taken the cert years ago, but here I am, fresh with faded knowledge since three years ago. Before, I don't have the money to do so. Now, I have, but the question is, should I do it or not?

WHY NOT! There is no harm is learning something new, no harm is trying something new. It is not like buying clothes or accessories, knowledge and skills will stay with you for a long long time if you use it wisely. So what am I waiting for! 

There you go, first, resume send. Secondly, I need to swallow a 900 pages worth of wine bible. Yeap indeed, wine bible. Then I need to take my cert, and pray hard that I will be hired. No more fooling around, and working without a goal. The goal is set, and I need to set off right away! Work hard, study hard and pray that everything will fall into place. I can do it!!!!

Dark Brown

I am a very kiamsiap person, like very very kiamsiap. That is why whenever I used my money on something, my heart will pain like hell and I will whine about it for a long long time. Out of no where ( Well, I did thought about it for a long long time, but have not really made up my mind before this ), we went to the hair salon and I came out with my hair dyed. And it is not cheap. TT

I don't know any good neighborhood salon, hence I settled for a well known one instead. Gosh, my forehead is so obvious in this picture. Goldfish forehead.

I choose dark brown as it is not too obvious and my mum won't get a heart attack when she sees me.The color looks more obvious now after one week, so let's see how long it will last. =) Even though I burnt a hole in my pocket, at least I finally done something that I always wanted to do.

B also had a hair cut and I thought he looked super handsome in this picture.hahahaha. =p

Sometimes, you need to break your normal routine in order to feel like you are still alive and kicking, even though it is not cheap.

Anyone going for Russells Petter show in Singapore? Can't wait. I am sure it would be a great night! 

Sometimes, I am very jealous with people who had set a clear mind set of what they want to be and what they want to achieve. It is not that I don't have one, just that I still have a choice. While clearing my mind and setting my goal, I need to gain as much experience and earn as much money as I can. Nothing in this world is possible without money. Well, some may disagree, but, its a cold hard fact.

You need money to get married, you need money to buy house, you need money to start your own business. Everything needs money. Yes, money may not buy you happiness, but money may lead you to happiness. Oh well, off I go to work now. 

p/s I had a good good rest for the past few days because I slept quite early. Thumbs up and keep it up! =)

Just me..

I..am not a funny person
I..am not a cute girl either
I..have mood swings
I..dislike people who interfere with what I am doing
I..dislike having not enough sleep, hence, emo
I..don't like changes

I..am very serious when it comes to work
I..like to do things in order
I..like to plan ahead of time
I..will panic if everything does not go fall in place
I..am very kiamsiap
I..always, never fail to cry whenever I watch anything to do with dog misfortune
I..take things personally

All in all, I am an insecure person, not funny, boring and like to sleep.

I know, I know everything about myself. Maybe not ALL, but most of it. I know that I am not perfect, flaws is what made me who I am today. Maybe to some people, I am too uptight, well, I am very uptight towards myself anyways. I took three months to finally decided to walk away with new lingerie because I cannot make up my mind. More like I hate to see my money flowing out like that. *Le sigh* Why am I like that?

If only I am a little bit more funny with more charisma
If only I don't plan so many things ahead of time
If only I don't be so kiamsiap
If only I don't take things too personally
If only I am perfectly secure

If, that is if. But, everything that you have or had, makes you who you are today. If I don't have all those in me, maybe I am not Zhi Lin anymore. I am just someone, who wants to be someone else.

The past tense, the present tense, and the future tense. I paint my own life, and is it colorful enough? I wanted to do so many things in life, but always being too scaredy cat to jump out of my comfy zone.I really salute people who can put down all the responsibilities, pack their stuffs and going out to explore the bigger world, to experience what life is really about.

One customers said, ' Life is too short to not enjoy it now.'

Agree much, agree. I need more courage, I need more life. I need to jump out of my comfy zone!

The ugly fact about life is, everything needs money. And you gotta work your butt off to earn money. But while you are earning money, the clock is also ticking away.How I wish I was born with silver spoon.

There is this high school couple who always shouting crying and fighting near my apartment. Her cry is so loud that I can even hear it on 18th floor.

Well, I was once like that ( Maybe not to that extend ). Being clingy, crying baby, superbly insecure, insanely sensitive etc etc. Now when I think back, am I acting my own soap drama at that time? Because you will never realize how silly you were until when you walked out of the shadow, and analyze it rationally. But that is life isn't it? You walk through all those phases to learn what is pain, what is falling in love, what is moving on, what is life. You may make silly mistakes, you may lose a few friends, you may never talk to that person anymore, but, there are billions of people on this earth, you ought to meet some and lose some.

So, let's laugh out loud, cry out loud and play hard in life. Life, doesn't have to be perfect. All those imperfections, flaws, scars, is what makes life so interesting.

I guess I am at the stage where I like to talk like a philosopher. haha. Ah well, I am still young. I am only in my early 20's. hahaha.

Oh by the way, I still like camwhoring though. So, let's end my post with a happy note ya. =p

A great week ahead people! 

p/s I can't can't wait to end my breakfast shift for the week. Damn.

Ola~

Ola! Hello blog, I am back after some time. Well, I am trying to learn how to braid my hair now because I am quite bored with pony tail hair every day. Damn, girls normally are good in it even when they are at a very young age, braiding each other's hair and such. But, thanks to my mum who loves to chop my hair, I was in short hair most of the time when I was young. Is it not too late to start learning now? First mission, achieve French Braiding. Or maybe I should grow my hair longer first? Hmmm. Will see.

Anyways, nothing much is going on right now. Trying to think what I should do when I am back in Malaysia end of May for my Convocation. Only three days to spare hence I need to plan really properly so no time will be wasted. I want to eat SOOOO many things back home! Like Banana Rice, Roti, proper mamak nasi lemak, laksa, yong tau foo, bak kut teh, wan tan mee etc etc. Grrrrr! It is just not the same here as we can get back at home.

Sometimes life can be such a joke you see. When you are not into that some thing, you can see it everywhere. But when you need it, then it is no where to be found. For example, everyday I see my nail clipper hanging around in the room. But when I really need it urgently, it is no where to be found. Or, everytime when I go to shopping mall, I see pretty formal clothes that I adore, but I don't need it at that time because i am not going to wear it. When I determined to get one for Convocation, I could not find any that suits me. Maybe it is hinting me to get whatever that grabs my eye and fits me where ever i go..haha. Nah, kidding. I am too kiamsiap to do so. Desperately trying to save more money now since I am going back soon.

Another thing before I sign off, one must know their own limitations and not to be too greedy. So what if you have SO many things in hand but not one is doing well? In the end, who will have the bear the consequences?

That's all for now, I need to go to work now. Ciaossss~

Food Glorious food

Since young, I am truly blessed with skinny genes in my family, and high metabolism rate. Hence, I am never overweight, or people always said I am thin. But just like anyone else, I believe that my high metabolism rate will bid me good bye anytime soon as I am growing older. And so, I always watch out for what I eat, and how I eat, call me a healthy freak. haha.

In my younger days, my mum will feed me and my brothers with vegetables, oats ( which I deteste and now my new love ), celery ( which me and my brothers hate the most last time and was converted into a celery lover ever since I stayed with B's family ), cooking with less oil etc etc. Because of that, I had been trained, to eat more vegetables because my mum said it is good for our body.

 

Then comes college whereby I learn more about food, and that comes my fascination towards cooking. I am exposed to different type of cuisines and learning more about their culture, how it was prepared and how it has changed. So instead of spending money on clothes and jewelries, I would rather spend it on food. I am not stingy when it comes to food, but as for other things, I am the total opposite.

 

Because of all these random factors, it has formed my eating habit now. For me, breakfast is the most important meal of the day. First thing in the morning after I wake up, I will drink some water. Then, I will have my breakfast, mostly multigrain food whenever I can , like wholemeal bread, or milo with oats, cereals etc. Eating breakfast is like starting your car's engine in the morning, it needs time to fuel up your body. It is also when your body can absorbs the most nutrition out of the food you consume. Because of that, I must have breakfast whenever I can, not nasi lemak or char kuey teow please. XD Healthy breakfast.

 

I rarely eat out, except when it is on our off day because we wanted to take a break from cooking.At normal days, we always take turns to cook at home. From normal rice, to brown rice, now we had upgraded to red rice. Even though red rice cost a bit more, but it is all worth it because it is good for our body.I used to have this misconception that rice will make me fat. It is not rice that makes you fat, it is how much of rice you consume that makes you fat.

 

Then, eat more vegetables. MORE! Seriously, I cannot live without vegetables. That is how crazy I am. When we were in France, it was winter and most of the restaurants do not serve vegetables on the side, simply because it is not easily available or expensive. My body went bizarre and I keep hunting for multigrains food or yogurt drink.

Don't starve yourself. I do not have gastric, but I never will want myself to get gastric anytime in the future. Therefore, I eat accordingly and do not diet. No people! I don't starve myself and diet all the time!! I actually eat more than you think I do. =)

I do eat ice creams and dessert. Frankly speaking, I love eating them. But do know your limits, and don't over do it. It is not okay to eat one whole pint of ice cream while watching tv, gorging down one whole cake or even finishing one whole chocolate bar on your own. Eat in moderation, that is the key.

 

Last but not least, learn how to cook. Because by cooking your own food, you will learn how to appreciate food more.By cooking, you will put more efforts into it and you will understand, that food don't come easily. You can also control what your body consume, whether it is the amount of salt or oil you put and you know, that there are no funny things inside like MSG or food coloring.

Staying thin, doesn't mean you have to starve yourself. Eat the right thing and eat the right amount. Of course, better still if you can exercise regularly.=)

Anyways, just a random topic that I feel like writing after posting up my food pictures. haha. Hope you find it interesting. XD

 

It's Monday

Oppsss..I think I should update something a little tad happier than the one which I complain and whine..XD Sorry about that people..Work work work, sometimes it really does get a bit frustrating..

What I need to learn, is that I should have some dignity to myself and learn how to protect myself more. Which is not let other's comment rock my emotions and confident. As long as I know what I am doing, as long as I know what is right, whatever that 'that person' says, I will just do it and that's it. Full stop. Control my frustrations, control my emotions, and just smileeeee~

But at the same time, time to hunt for a better future and improve myself. I need to get my study mode back. XD

That's all about work. Talking about cooking, recently I have much fun in cooking at home. haha. Instead of having a proper menu planning in my mind, I just grab whatever vegetables and meat that I feel like grabbing and decide on that day itself what I should cook. First day I made Stir Fried Beef with Spring Onion, then comes improvised Sushi roll with bread instead of sushi rice plus Pasar Malam style of spring roll and stir fried ramyeon with tobokki, and tonight, its Linlin version of fried rice..Why so?Because my pan is too small and I have to cook my ingredients separately. Nevertheless, I think it taste awesome. XD Gah..I wish i have an oven, full set of pastry ingredients..Then fuh, can make anything already..haha.

One morning while going to the restaurant, I greeted our regular customers with a big smile on my face. And then they asked, 'Why are you so happy this early in the morning?'

I said, ' I have to be happy isn't it? '

The moral of the story is, no matter what happen at work, when you face your customers, you will still need to smile, and be happy. Actors and actresses you may say, but, thats our job.

怨

有的时侯，真的做工做得好生气。尤其是今天。所谓的 ‘好心被雷劈’， 我今天真的体会到了。明明他人有错，我看见了就好心地帮一下，指点一下。结果，就被训了一下。对！我是自作聪明，明明不关我事我还多管闲事。

做个上司， 就有责任要管好自己的店。而不是三不两下就把一切丢给经验不足的工读生。成天出去抽烟，要么就叫别人来帮忙。难道我们有那么的空闲吗？帮你一次或两次不代表我们要每次都帮你。尽然顺手就把责任推给我们！

我做什么，都有我自己的理由。如果每一次，我都要帮你收拾烂摊，而且还要被责怪的话，这口气，我可吞不下。我现在是忍气吞声，不代表我以后也会那样。

真的很不公平！为什么别人错得更离谱，却安然无恙？ 我们却为了一丁点的错误，被说得狗血淋头。为了公司，跑上跑下。担心这个，担心那个。为了他人的错，而被客户埋怨。而其它的人，却高枕无忧的在办公室里办事。面对客户的是我们，被骂的也是我们。一有什么问题，承担的也是我们。咳。。

满肚的怨气，我承受的了多少？我想，把我自己的本分做好就好了。其他的，就让他自甘堕落吧。心灰了。。那把奋斗的精神，向前冲的毅力，也没了。就忍个七个月吧！ 到时候，就重新在别的公司找回我心中的那把火。

Let's see...

An opportunity or a self-digging-grave?

I wonder...I wonder...

Let's play along and see where it will lead me to...I suppose..haha

A mouse looking alike picture of myself..

This is how I look after my hair cut the last time I went back to Malaysia..Damn..How I miss my hair at this state..

And now, its growing like a wild grass..TT 

( But in this picture also I already comb my hair nicely..Imagine without..@@)

The purpose of this post, is none..haha..I just saw the mouse looking picture of mine and I just feel like posting it..But I really do miss my hair in that picture..Of course, it is almost impossible to maintain it like that at all time.Partially because I am too lazy to blow it dry every single time..Blame my laziness..I want to straighten and color my hair once it is long enough..I have never dyed my hair ever in my life and I am thinking I must at least try once in my life. Right? If my mum ever complain then I'll just say I stood under the sun too long and my hair turned brown. ^^

I wore a 5 inch heels that day and damn, its killing my feet. I had blisters everywhere and I have to suffer every single time my feet touched the water..Oh well, at least that day I thought I look good. haha. I only have one day in a week to dress up nicely and if it means that I will get blisters on my feet, be it!!! 

Anyways, enough of slacking and time to hit the bed. Need some good old rest before work tomorrow. Ciaos people! XD

Random thoughts

Random Thoughts

1. I am 23 years old this year, and I am somewhat forgetting that I am 23. It is like I am back at an awkward age whereby I am not sure where I am at. Am I a young adult? Or an adult now? It is like deciding on what to wear. Should I dress up more maturely, or should I just wear what I like to wear?

2. Sometimes u see things happening, you feel like you should do something you can do something about it, but in reality, you can't. Because you do not have the authority to do so. What you can do, is to play your role well, and watch it falls apart. Can we survive? I hope so. If not, I guess it is time to change into a new environment.

3. The thing I hate the most in this world is when you need to clean up other people's mess. But what b say is right. Why should we care so much, just let that person bear the cost at the end of the day. As long as we did our part well, we will be safe.

4. You have the passion, you have the drive, but because of poor management, you gradually lost it. The day when I have reached my limits, is the day I leave to find back my passion and drive.

5. I am being a healthy freak recently. From rice, to brown rice to red rice. Every morning I will make sure I ate something with high fibre to start off my day. I try to drink as yogurt drink as often as I can, and ensuring that I have a lot of vegetables intake every day. Am I being abnormal?

6. I need a vacation soon...I need to relax...I need it soon....

Alrights. That is all for now..I need to get ready to work soon..and It's a freaking Sunday..TT

Too blunt?

I guess being too straightforward and blunt can back fire at times..Sometimes, I really cannot be pretentious and probably that is my biggest weakness at work. When I dislike someone, I really dislike that person. So yeap, I don't care which position you are holding, I don't have to pretend as if we are happy lovey dovey buddy when we are not.

Then I realize, what if because of this, I am forever stuck at this position and never get a promotion? Hmmm..Shoots..

Work is never easy, there will always be endless politics and honestly, I don't give a damn. I just want to do my job and that's it. Honestly speaking, I know I am still new and I am still learning how to handle different situations at work. I made mistakes, and I need to learn from my mistakes. I must must remember that.

I cannot be too serious at work at times, I must relax, calm down and think carefully. Breathhhhh~ Think~ and take action~~~

I need to prove to those people that I can do my job well, despite being small and all. Ish! Alright. I need to work harder in the future..Gambate!

To those bitc**es out there! I will prove to you that I CAN DO IT! HMPH!

To this very special man

I am not a perfect girlfriend I know..I am whinny..I have a temper at times 'ahem'..I can be a little childish and sensitive..and I am insecure..

This very person since college time, had thought me to have faith in myself especially in studies..Even though I practically swallow the notes before exams, I am still worried that I can not do it...It is he, who became  my study partner, my motivator especially when he can remember almost everything even i study more..hmph! and also my ohmmm calming partner.

As we both started our first job in Singapore, life has been pretty good because I have him by my side. Without him, I don't think we can make it through our first month without any income here. I don't feel so lonely because I know at the end of the day, he will still come back to me after work. I had been fed with good home cook food pretty well because we both cook for each other. When I need to have the urge to spill out everything, he will always lend me his ears even though I know it is pretty irritating.

I still have a lot that I need to improve in, and a lot that I need to learn.

I don't want to be like a whinny and naggy housewife. Ermm..Maybe once in a while just to loose some steam? haha..I will learn to leave all those emotional stress at work in the restaurant, and walk home with a smiley face because I am happy to see my darling after a day at work..

I will learn 'yes, try and learn again..haha' to control my sensitivity and insecure that I had yet to overcome. oppps. Girlsss..ya me.

One day, we will also have the lavish to go on a very good vacation together again ya. Now, just suck it up and work our butt off to save money. =)



Thank you darling for the surprise! It was a really sweet one, especially after work. =) And I, will also love you forever and always.

Kaka, sorry for the tears before that. =p

To this special man in my life..I lubo lubo you..XD

Its all in your mind

Now only I realize that I am so immature to let these little people to hit me so hard and left me burning in anger. I should have shrug it off and move on like a warrior, not whining like a old woman. I am so angry and pissed off at certain people because of how selfish and ignorant they are, and it made me into a protagonist.

It is not easy to control my emotions, especially anger and damn, it has been a while ya? What I need to learn, is to accept the fact that in any work, there will be good people, and bad people. Learn from the good ones, and take them as your role model. Learn from the bad ones, and never be like them.

My goal is to save money and gain experience. Never forget that, and always keep that in mind. Life, is never easy. You will meet all kinds of people, the ones that will hurt you, and the ones that will help you. It is all in how you control your mind, and how good you master your emotions.

Lastly, never give up until you gave it all. Keep pushing my limitations and see how far I can go. I will see how much I can endure, and when enough is enough, then it is time to let go. Sometimes life is not about earning money right? It is how you live it with no regrets. My happiness, is still my top priority.

Gotta try and remember everything that I have said, and hopefully I will slowly learn how to survive in this industry.

Five Balls

Five Balls
From the book "Suzanne's Diary to Nicholas" by James Patterson

Imagine life as a game in which you are juggling some five balls in the air. You name them - Work - Family - Health - Friends - Spirit, and you're keeping all of these in the air.

You will soon understand that work is a rubber ball. If you drop it, it will bounce back. But the other four balls -- family, health, friends and spirit are made of glass. If you drop one of these, they will be irrevocably scuffed, marked, nicked, damaged or even shattered.

They will never be the same. You must understand that and strive for balance in your life. How?

1. Don't undermine your worth by comparing yourself with others. It is because we are different that each of us is special.

2. Don't set your goals by what other people deem important. Only you know what is best for you.

3. Don't take for granted the things closest to your heart. Cling to them as you would your life, for without them, life is meaningless.

4. Don't let your life slip through your fingers by living in the past or for the future. By living your life one day at a time, you live ALL the days of your life.

5. Don't give up when you still have something to give. Nothing is really over until the moment you stop trying.

6. Don't be afraid to admit that you are less than perfect. It is this fragile thread that binds us together.

7. Don't be afraid to encounter risks It is by taking chances that we learn how to be brave.

8. Don't shut love out of your life by saying it's impossible to find. The quickest way to receive love is to give; the fastest way to lose love is to hold it too tightly; and the best way to keep love is to give it wings.

9. Don't run through life so fast that you forget not only where you've been, but also where you are going.

10. Don't forget that a person's greatest emotional need is to feel appreciated.

11. Don't be afraid to learn. Knowledge is weightless, a treasure you can always carry easily.

12. Don't use time or words carelessly. Neither can be retrieved.

Happy CNY!

HAPPY CNY everyone!

I know its a little tad late, but im pretty much caught up with my drama so I don't have much time to blog..haha..How was your CNY celebration? This is perhaps the most heard question in this week..As for mine, well, it was very much spent on work..@@ But, it is all worth it because I will have four days off next week. Yeahu! Cannot wait to go back and indulge in my yummy foodie at home..XD

First time CNY away from home, and its pretty, okay. haha. Not too bad as I am not really that homesick type. As long as I can sleep well, eat well, I am pretty much contented. But, of course if I have the chance I would like to go back as well. CNY in Singapore is very much, scary I must say. Like in Malaysia, even though it is a public holiday, not everywhere is close, especially mall. They will still operate as we love to go out on CNY. But here, everywhere..i mean EVERYWHERE is close. The only FnB outlets available in malls will be fast food outlets like McD, KFC etc. TT

I was starving like mad on CNY eve and it is quite pathetic right if my 'Reunion Dinner' is spent at a fast food restaurant. In the end, we found Nandos and we are happy enough to sit in and have our dinner..Thank god. At least we don't have to eat burger..haha..

Because I don't have the chance to like go out for visitings this year, I have been religiously wearing red if I have the chance to. haha..

And then I realize, I have quite a few red outfits ya..not bad not bad..=p

While everyone enjoying their good food at home, I had developed an red eye as a result of not enough sleep. And I have to wear specs to work for two three days in order to let my eyes to recover. Damn...I hate wearing specs..TT Even on my birthday..huhuuuuu...

Oh yes, as usual, my birthday falls on CNY, again. And lucky me I can rest at home because my manager arrange my off day on my birthday. But, B is working pulak...Damnnn! Nevertheless, we did went out for lunch...Korean food ftw! Yeahuuuu..

Our fav Korean Mixed Rice..=)

As for my birthday treat, we bought ourselves a new phone each! And it is my favorite Samsung S2! Yeahuuuu..

We had been craving for this phone for a long long time and somehow, this phone is always out of stock because the demand is very high. Then at the same time our Nokia phone is giving us headache because it always hang and black out. So! A little treat for ourselves! And thank you my darling for sponsoring my phone! MUAKSSSSS..Me LOVE you! =)

Loving My Love cover! <3 <3

So, I am already 23 years old. *Damn!* But nevertheless, no matter how much I dread aging, it will still happen anyway..haha. So that's all for now. I need to get ready for work soon! A lovely week ahead to everyone! 

Happy CNY again! =)